In My Head

I've been living in my head a lot these last few months. Thoughts about the kids future are always on my mind.
Today was the last day of school. This has been an exciting day for us in the past but today was a sad day for us all. August was not happy when I picked him up on the playground...just another bad day to end a bad year. Friends were not friendly. Things ended on a sour note for him.
Hazel was melancholy as well. Hugging her teacher tightly and hoping to see her again. I took the kids to a park where we were told folks were getting together to celebrate...but it was just us and two other families. The kids had hoped to see more of their classmates.
As we drove home, Hazel started slumping in the back seat while August buried his nose in my iPhone.
August put his book bag away for the last time this school year and Hazel put on some comfy clothes before collapsing on the couch in the living room.
The TV is on right now and they have both turned off their brains. I just read an email from August's teacher that informed me that they will not be able to put him in the classroom that we need him to be in...It's a struggle for me to see the good in this situation.
I keep reminding myself that I had similar feelings of anxiety when I left the JCC. I worked there for 3 years and just couldn't do it any longer. It was a huge change, I went from working full time to...not working full time. And things worked out perfectly.
Change is so scary for me. I like to know what's going to happen at every turn. The way things are right now, we'll have the kids registered at 2 schools. We don't want to pull the kids from their current school until we know 100% that August won't be in the right room but we have to go ahead and enroll them at the new school so that we know they'll have a place to go...
It's going to be a difficult summer full of waiting and worrying for me while I pretend to be excited for the change so that the kids have a positive outlook on the whole event.