Getting Closer

I took Monday and Tuesday off this week. I did it because I had a phone appointment with a nurse to do a "teaching" about my surgery on Monday and then a pre operation physical with my primary doctor on Tuesday. Honestly, I didn't need to take the time off, both were scheduled for the mornings but I had the sick time and went ahead and did it.
So. Glad. I. Did.
The phone appointment had me in tears during the conversation. She was quite lovely, I was quite overwhelmed with all the information she was giving me.
The surgery should take 3 hours but I'll probably be in the hospital closer to 6 with pre and post junk. She started to go into detail about moving the muscles in my neck to access the thyroid...I had to ask her to stop. It was causing me to panic a bit...I started crying. Poor gal...she was just trying to educate me. She was under the impression that the more I knew about the operation, the more calm I would be...knowledge is power...   Except that's not so true for me. I'd rather be in the dark. Put that IV in and make me take a nice little nap.
Needless to say, I was a wreck all day on Monday and was quite worked up about meeting with my doctor the next day.

So Tuesday rolls along and my appointment is first thing in the morning. I was worked up because I wanted to ask my lovely doctor if she could prescribe some calming drugs for the days leading up to the  procedure. Asking for drugs makes me nervous. I've watched too many medical dramas and think that if I ask for them she will think I'm a junkie.
Well she didn't think that. In fact she was rather helpful. Gave me 2 prescriptions, one for sleep and one for calm. I haven't had to take any yet...just knowing they are available is helpful.
We talked through the biopsy, she agreed that it sounded like a terrible procedure. I felt validated.
It won't surprise you to learn that I cried again. She was understanding.
And I wasn't AS upset after that appointment, but having these things one right after the other really made all my fears come back to the surface.

I'm again in the mode of trying to stay busy. This week I signed up for three classes at Barre3 up the road. I'm continuing bootcamp with my old personal trainer and I'm running the lake when I can. Work is wrapping up, which brings other emotions to the surface, but it's keeping me busy.

The house sold. We had several families bidding for it. I'm happy with the family who purchased it. They will fit in with our neighbors just right.

Lots of changes. Lots of lasts. Lots to look forward to...after the 18th.